The cycle of exhaustion

I have had a very stressful week this week and it definitely doesn't show any signs of improving. This, combined with a few other factors, led to my brain being incredibly overactive last night and not letting me sleep. It's like being stuck in a conversation with someone who spends hours on end going into extreme detail about their day, from how many times they hit the snooze button to the difficulty they had choosing between a cheeseburger or a bacon cheeseburger for dinner. And the rest of my body was too polite to tell it to shut up so we could get some sleep. It took until 4am for me to be tired enough to ignore it and pass out. I had to get up at 6am.

And so begins the horrible cycle of exhaustion.

THE MORNING AFTER

When I first wake up after a night like this I'm always unbelievably alert. My brain has decided that I just had a wonderful 2-hour nap and I should be ready to go on with my day, forgetting that I was trying for a full night's sleep. My body gathers all of it's energy (I imagine it having a magical bag full of energy that it doles out, kind of like Santa giving presents to children) and, confused by the signals from my brain, believes that it has plenty left to get me through until bed time. Before either of them can correct this assumption, I pump myself full of caffeine. Now my body has more energy than it could ever use! This way I get through my morning without a problem.

THE AFTERNOON CRASH

My body spends the first part of the day handing out energy with glee. Taking a test? No problem, here's a bunch of energy to get you through it. Writing a blog? Why not, we have tons of energy to spare! More coffee? Why yes, please! Unfortunately I can't keep up this charade all day. I'm only willing to put so much of my spending money into keeping myself awake. Unaware that the caffeine supply is running low, my body continues to give out energy with reckless abandon.

Suddenly it happens. My brain says "body, would you mind climbing these stairs for me?" "With pleasure!' my body replies, reaching into it's magical bag. And realizing that there's not much left in there.

Full on panic mode starts. I go from being alert and ready to face my day to being barely capable to even deal with the stairs in front of me in a matter of milliseconds. My body hoards energy, giving out just enough to get me by, and watches fretfully as the supplies run lower and lower. It starts yelling at my brain "SLEEP! GO TO SLEEP! NOW!!!!", which is especially annoying when I am, say, driving my car somewhere. My eyes lose their ability to focus properly and I become clumsier than I already am as my brain fights between its need to shut down and its need to get me home first.

THE REST OF THE DAY

I become barely capable of functioning. My body resists any kind of movement, preferring to stay where it is and save the meager amount of energy that still remains. My brain is spending so much time fighting with itself that even forming a coherent sentence becomes difficult. All hopes of being productive are thrown out the window.

THE NEXT DAY

No matter how much sleep I get the next night, waking up the next day is like trying to dig my way to China with my bare hands. My brain has tired itself out from all the fighting yesterday, and my body is still in survival mode and refuses to give out more than the bare minimum of energy required. Sentences are slightly easier to form than last night, but any activity which doesn't require huge amounts of attention results in a strong desire to go back to bed.

It's not until the next night that there's any hope of breaking the cycle. Of course, my brain and body learn nothing from this experience, and happily repeat the whole thing a month or two down the road.