The Dot-Matrix Printer
This printer is an old dog that's been forced to learn a new trick. At my company it has two jobs: print cheques, and print invoices. The first it does no problem at all, clearly in line with it's original function. The second, not so much. First, it has trouble taking the paper. Then, once it finally manages to load properly and print it doesn't want to let go of the paper. And once I remove the paper, it has to be restarted before I can start the whole process all over again. The printer tries, it really tries. But clearly it struggles working with the larger size of paper, like an old man struggling to learn to use a cell phone.
The Desktop
My desktop is the newest piece of machinery that I work with. Which isn't saying much. Still, it reminds me of an overachiever, with one weakness. 99% of the time it works beautifully, completing commands with grace and ease. However, it seems to have a pathological fear of the fax program. When I load the program, the whole screen turns beige and it takes effort to everything back to normal. And every once in a while the desktop freaks out and shuts the program down.
The Fax Machine
This machine is a simpleton, straight up. It can do one task at a time, and that's it. Either it can send a fax, or it can print a confirmation. As soon as it's doing one, it's tiny brain it working at full capacity and NOTHING ELSE CAN BE DONE until that task is completed. Not to mention that sometimes it doesn't seem to understand what pressing the "send" button means. Poor, simple fax machine.
The Copier/Scanner
Ever read hitchiker's guide to the galaxy? If you haven't, the important point here is there a machine called Marvin. He's very depressed. And has this constant pain in all the diodes down his left side. The copier/scanner machine reminds me of Marvin. It does what it's told, but often not without a lot of grumbling. It constantly jams, and sometimes completely fails to send the scan where you told it to go. Occasionally, it will tell me there's a jam somewhere, but after opening all of the different compartments you find out it was making up a problem. Dealing with this machine is beyond frustrating. But when it decides to work it does everything we need to it do, so it doesn't get replaced.
See where I'm coming from, fellow Douglas Adams Fans?
The Printer
You know the stereotypical jock from highschool? The guy that's not too bright, but is good at sports so he's the figurative belle of the ball? That's our printer. It does a fantastic job of printing. Fast, efficient, and rarely breaks down. However, it struggles to process print jobs that aren't a basic word document. And sometimes, it has to think about each individual page of a job before it can print it. Not too bright, but still a good printer.
The Coffee Machine
The coffee machine is brilliant. A genius in its own right. But it does things his way. Want to use the same pot to put water in the machine that you're going to hold the coffee in? No can do. Once the water starts going in, coffee is going to be made whether you're ready or not. It makes a good pot of coffee in no time at all though, so what's a little inconvenience here and there?
My desktop is the newest piece of machinery that I work with. Which isn't saying much. Still, it reminds me of an overachiever, with one weakness. 99% of the time it works beautifully, completing commands with grace and ease. However, it seems to have a pathological fear of the fax program. When I load the program, the whole screen turns beige and it takes effort to everything back to normal. And every once in a while the desktop freaks out and shuts the program down.
The Fax Machine
This machine is a simpleton, straight up. It can do one task at a time, and that's it. Either it can send a fax, or it can print a confirmation. As soon as it's doing one, it's tiny brain it working at full capacity and NOTHING ELSE CAN BE DONE until that task is completed. Not to mention that sometimes it doesn't seem to understand what pressing the "send" button means. Poor, simple fax machine.
The Copier/Scanner
Ever read hitchiker's guide to the galaxy? If you haven't, the important point here is there a machine called Marvin. He's very depressed. And has this constant pain in all the diodes down his left side. The copier/scanner machine reminds me of Marvin. It does what it's told, but often not without a lot of grumbling. It constantly jams, and sometimes completely fails to send the scan where you told it to go. Occasionally, it will tell me there's a jam somewhere, but after opening all of the different compartments you find out it was making up a problem. Dealing with this machine is beyond frustrating. But when it decides to work it does everything we need to it do, so it doesn't get replaced.
See where I'm coming from, fellow Douglas Adams Fans?
The Printer
You know the stereotypical jock from highschool? The guy that's not too bright, but is good at sports so he's the figurative belle of the ball? That's our printer. It does a fantastic job of printing. Fast, efficient, and rarely breaks down. However, it struggles to process print jobs that aren't a basic word document. And sometimes, it has to think about each individual page of a job before it can print it. Not too bright, but still a good printer.
The Coffee Machine
The coffee machine is brilliant. A genius in its own right. But it does things his way. Want to use the same pot to put water in the machine that you're going to hold the coffee in? No can do. Once the water starts going in, coffee is going to be made whether you're ready or not. It makes a good pot of coffee in no time at all though, so what's a little inconvenience here and there?
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